Affirming Online Relationship Therapy in Texas & PSYPACT States

Couples therapy is typically focused on two individuals who, for one reason or another, are struggling to communicate, relate, and connect (though many relationship structures might seek therapy who would not identify as a “couple”).

This is an affirming space for polyamorous relationships, too.

Often, styles of relating are deeply rooted in fear of rejection, retribution, or simply not having the appropriate communication skills to deliver the intended message. Couples therapy is designed to help each member of the relationship communicate and connect with responsibility, respect, and meaning.

A diverse group of polyamorous partners and metamours sit outside on the grass, hugging and smiling toward the viewer.

Here are just some of the things I can help you navigate through online LGTBQIA+ and polyamory-affirming couples and relationship therapy:

Two partners sit in a bed together with their small dog, one partner holding a phone and the other holding a book. They both smile and appear to be mid-conversation, both looking up from what they're holding.

Sex and Relationships

This is a broad topic when considering the coupled (or “throupled”) relationship. Learning to communicate desires, fears, and curiosities can increase intimacy and revive the novelty typically reserved for newfound relationships. Sometimes we don’t know how to “fight fair” within our relationships, or feel that disagreement means disaster. This doesn’t have to be true! We enter into relationships of all kinds — whether romantic, platonic, anonymous, or working — with our own ideas, education, communication styles, and social backgrounds, and this means we have to learn and grow together to make lasting, meaningful connections. Couples therapy focused on sex and relationships helps you to find common ground and learn from your partner, as well as learn how you want to show up for your partner now and in the future.

Desire Discrepancy or Difference

It is not uncommon for couples to experience differences in sexual desire, frequency, and passion. Unfortunately, these discrepancies are often laden with social and gender norms, ideas of comparison, and linking these ideas to our feelings and perceptions about the relationship. For instance, “If you want to have a lot of sex with me, then I know that I am important and attractive to you.” While a statement like this might not be said out loud, deeper meaning is often attached to a difference in sexual desire or frequency, but communication within the couple does not make this “common knowledge.” I feel that it is important for couples to explore these differences with openness and compassion, as there is probably more to it than simply feeling that “once a week is not enough.”

Anxiety and Mood Difficulties Creating Distance

When one member of a couple is struggling with anxiety or depression, the relationship can suffer under the weight of the difficulty faced by one. Emotional issues can feel confusing and isolating, as one member feels stuck or broken and the other feels helpless or frustrated. Learning to navigate personal and interpersonal communication, compassion, and responsibility can help the healing process and lead to growth and strength within the relationship. If the non-sufferer can take on a supportive role, rather than being a “fixer,” and if the sufferer can learn coping tools and strategies to navigate their difficult emotions and avoid expecting perfect answers and understanding from their partner, this couple can sustain and thrive in the face of adversity.

Sexual Communication and Intimacy

When you are out in public with your partner or friends, do you ever find that any sexually themed discussions are automatically turned down to a whisper? This is an all too common occurrence! Regardless of your beliefs on public discussions of human sexuality, maintaining this hushed tone within your relationship can interfere with consent, openness, satisfaction, and play. Depending on your family of origin, sex education, and personal experiences surrounding sex and sexuality, talking to your partner about sex and learning how to improve intimacy within your relationship (including emotional intimacy) can feel daunting and out of reach. Working to assess and address your feelings surrounding the topic of sexuality can improve communication in all areas of your relationship.

Infidelity

Sexual and emotional affairs are familiar terms in our society, but who is really to blame? The cheater, or the cheated? Rather than examining or assigning blame (it is typically clear who committed the infidelity, after all), it may be more important to determine what is broken, what can be rebuilt, and whether or not the relationship is salvageable. Sometimes infidelity happens because partners are struggling to communicate their frustrations or disappointments and are either looking to have an emotional or physical need met, or are merely looking for a way to end the relationship. The way is typically forward, not backwards into blaming or grasping for details and information. Forward progress means examining the aspects of the relationship that have remained unattended, acknowledging the pain and regret each partner feels, and making a choice to heal. This may not save the relationship, but it may salvage dignity, instill understanding, and help begin the process of regaining confidence in each partner’s abilities to relate to others – and possibly love – again.